Jersey - What a trip!

  After searching for a job for seven months I finally found a position that I really think I can enjoy and excel in!  Only part-time in retail, but I hope to dazzle them with my mad skills and get a full time position when it becomes available.  Because it is supervisory position I had to have specific training that was only available in a store in New Jersey.  As the crow flies it was only 16 miles from Manhattan, but as a New Jersey transit buses go it was almost two hours EACH way.

  My first day I had to be there by 8:00 a.m., which meant I needed to leave the house by 5:30 a.m. to catch the subway to the Port Authority Bus Terminal.  When you go to Penn Station to catch a train there is a giant board that give destinations,, departure times, and gates, not so at the bus station.  I had to wait for the ticket booth to open, (only one window opened at 6 a.m) pray that the long line went quickly to ask an agent what my gate was, and make a mad dash for it.

  For the first couple of days I wondered why so many Hispanic workers were leaving the city to go to New Jersey for work.  I day or so later I had an "ah, ha" moment and realized that they were workers going home after a graveyard shift. The late afternoon bus back to the city had the same people heading into the city to begin that shift.

  On all the movies they show the view of Manhattan from Brooklyn Heights, but I found out that the real view is from the New Jersey side.  After coming out of the Lincoln Tunnel the bus would wind it's way through Jersey City dropping off it's weary passengers on their sleepy walks through their neighborhoods revealing the wonderful view of Manhattan from the The World Trade Tower being resurrected to the south, the Chelsea Peers protruding into the Hudson, and the Trump Residential Towers marking the Upper West Side.  I've heard that you can see Time Square from space and I used to wonder about that.  But from the Jersey side I had a view of the West Side of Manhattan.  There was a strange neon flashing coming from the core of  midtown west. Because it was from a distance I wasn't sure what it was at first, but then when I realized how far I was away from the city I was stunned by the intensity of the light.

  Once  I reached my destination in Westwood I was let off into a sleepy little downtown quietly waking up.  Yellow school buses kept traffic paced, shop keepers began to open up their doors, and commuter trains whistled through intersections. I would stop at Goldberg's Bagels to grab a cup of coffee and walk the two baby sized blocks to the boutique for work.  Everything there seemed normal, yet so strange after not leaving Manhattan for seven months.  The two story buildings revealed the sky above without having to crane my neck, no WALK signs were needed to cross the street, and there was literally no one on the sidewalk and it was 9:00 a.m.  Relaxing and a little lonely at the same time.

  Every bus ride I would sit down behind the driver and put my bag in the seat next to me to keep anyone from sitting next to me.  The bus was never full so don't think I'm a total jerk, but with two hours ahead of me the last thing I wanted was to have to make conversation with someone.

  A variety of characters rode this bus.  There was the snoring man who got on in Manhattan and snored his way for two hours to Westwood, the woman who boarded with her two preschool sons for a local ride to spend the entire 15 minutes on the bus telling them (loudly) that only adults were allowed to push the button to request a stop, and the Asian teenager who argued on her cell phone in Chinese with her mother only to call her friend to tell her (and everyone else on the bus) in English everything her mother had said.

  After four days on the bus I was on my way back to the city on Friday afternoon. (I had Wednesday off, if you I wondering how I got four out of five day week).   I wasn't really tired and riding in the seat behind the driver gives a limited view, so I decided to be bold and sit in the very front seat across from the driver.  I put my purse next to me and hoped that I could enjoy the ride home enjoying the view.  I don't even think we had been on the bus for 10 minutes before a young man  asked if he could sit next to me. After sitting down he asked the driver "What time are we scheduled to get into Manhattan?" Ugh.. I was going to have a seatmate all the way into the city.

  At first all he did was play Temple Run on his Ipod, which was irritating because he had the volume up and there was the annoying sound of chattering monkeys every time he lost (which seemed to be quite often).  Out of nowhere he said "You know you look like that mom from that 1990's show "Growing Pains", Joanna Kerns."  It was a strange comment, but I took it as a compliment.  He then began to ask me why I was going into Manhattan.  Needless to say I had to return the question.  What a mistake.  I had an hour and a half of him telling me about his eBay sales of limited addition tennis shoes.  He also had photos on his phone of all the shoes in his inventory along with stories on how he obtained the shoes through conventions, standing in long lines for releases, and trading with private dealers. When the traffic into the Lincoln Tunnel was nothing more than a parking lot due to a stalled car in the tunnel I wanted to tell him that I'd been up since 5:30 and I just wanted to take a nap, but he would interject just enough questions to keep it a conversation instead of a monologue so I didn't have the heart to say anything.

  If nothing else my hair and my face can't take the commute.  The hair and make-up that looks good at 5:30 a.m. in my apartment has transformed to bed-head after falling asleep against a foggy bus window and the 9:00 a.m. face is completely different than the pre-dawn face that I made-up hours before. Thank goodness my training is over and my real commute is only three blocks away from my apartment, but I actually learned more than I ever imagined about commuting and those who are brave enough to do it.

Paranormal and the Jedi Knights

  I hope I am not naive when I suggest that the "meet-up group" is unique to New York City. 

  Jordan actually was the first person to join a meet-up a few months ago.  She found one where people interested in practicing their Japanese language skills would meet to only speak in Japanese.  She had joined their website and RSVP'ed to the meet-up date, but when she had to cancel later than the 24 hour window allowed because she got called into work they booted her out of the group.  Harsh.

  She also joined a meet-up for anime.  If you know anything about this genre you will understand my concern for her going to this meeting. Once you have joined the meet-up group online you are able to see who has accepted the invitation for the next meeting.  In this case Jordan said the members that had RSVP'ed were seven men all above the ages of 40 years old.  I asked her if she really thought 40 year old men would be there to discuss Miyazaki's latest films or would they more likely be there to discuss anime commonly seen on Adult Swim. At 22 she does not have to listen to her mother, but in this case I'm glad she did.

  One of the things that I had looked forward to in finding a job was making new friends.  In November with no job prospects in-sight I decided to find a meet-up group where I might meet some people with a common interest. Since our adventures at the Stanley Hotel last winter I have had a renewed interest in the paranormal so I searched for a NYC Ghost Hunters Meet-Up. 

  My first meet-up with the group was in November.  It was a lively group with everyone eager to go around the table and to introduce themselves and to share a paranormal experience. I was very excited when a self professed psychic said that when I walked into the restaurant she whispered to her husband that she saw that I had a spirit attached to me.  Spooky, but all in all it was a lot of fun.

  This month it was a little different if for no other reason than Jordan decided to come with me.  There were not as many people so everyone had an opportunity to talk a little more.

  BUT... there was this one kid (and I say "kid" because he was in his 20's and socially immature) who had to interject his own story on top of everyone else's experience.  Ok, so maybe he has some disorder and I'm dismissing him as annoying, but I don't care. It was driving me crazy.

  Another interesting character was the group's resident psychic named Victor, but he dismissed some people like John Edwards who I actually like, so that turned me off a bit and he started talking about UFO's which I just don't see the connection between ghost and ET. He was nice and interesting, but he is no Chip Coffee (host of Paranormal Kids).

  There was a beautiful Hispanic girl named Isis who was there for the first time.  She had some very interesting stories, but her voice was so soft that I thought I was listening to Janet Jackson.

   The most ditrubing new face was Salvador.   He is a member of the ghost hunting team, although I wasn't ever able to catch what his skills are and he did not share any experiences.  When he first walked in he looked directly at me and we had an extended eye contact.  I am not making that up because Jordan confirmed it to me after the meeting.  I've always wondered if a psychic or an intuitive sees a negative aura around a person do they tell the stranger or do they just walk away. The fact that his eyes locked on me when he first walked in but he never spoke to me afterwards totally spooked me out.

  Last month I thought the leader of the group, Dom, was kind of weird and bossy, but he seemed to have eyes for Jordan, so this time he was all smiles and light, which made him much more palatable. I admit that I can be (on occasion) bossy, so maybe I saw myself in him.  But this time I quite enjoyed his tales of ghost hunting, including a large number of stories of lonely people who contact the Paranormal Society looking for someone to come to their house for a brief exchange of companionship.

  Please visualize that over the course of the evening I am kicking Jordan under the table whenever anyone says anything that I think is weird or I disagree with, which was almost the whole time.

  To add to the absurdity of the evening, half way through our two hour meeting another meet-up group comes in.  For some reason the Skylight Diner on West 34th Street is the most popular spot for a wide variety of groups.  So at nine o'clock a large group begins to arrive.  Dom said, "Oh, no I forgot.  Tonight the Jedi Knight meet-up group is having their gathering.."  When he said that I immediately visualized a troop of Star Wars nerds filling the place.  It was so strangely the opposite.  I think the criteria to be in the group was not only a love for Star Wars, but to be between the ages of 21 and 30, gay, and gorgeous.  It was like being at an Abercrombie & Fitch staff meeting.

   But this is what I love about New York.  On a Monday night in January at a diner off the beaten path you can get a crazy collection of New Yorkers out to meet and to be met.  Pick your interest.  I'm sure there is a meet-up group for you.

Tour Tips for a Tough City

  We have lived in New York for seven months and we have had a variety of visitors with more scheduled on the calendar.  In the past two weeks my mother has visited from Kansas and Cameron's 14 year old friend, from Evergreen, CO have visited.  You would think after our revolving door of guest I would have developed a fail proof tour of New York City laid out for any type of guest. Most people only get one trip to New York in their life time. I take making their visit special very seriously. 

  The one thing that I know for sure is that the guest needs to go to Time Square twice.  The first time so that they can have that moment when they know they are in the heart of the city.  The second time so that they can shop in at least one of the mega stores (six story Forever 21, M&M's store, Toys R us with a Ferris wheel inside, etc...). Time Square is the ultimate tourist trap, but you do have to go there.  There is really nothing like it anywhere else in the world.  And once you've completed your second trip there you never have to go back, unless you live here and you will always go back because there will always be another visitor who needs to see it.  We had some guest this fall who stayed with us while they protested with the Occupy Wall Street group, so you would think that they wouldn't have any interest in anything as commercial as Time Square, but they loved it and even went to the M&M store twice!

  The next most obvious place is Rockefeller Center.  There is really nothing to do there, but it is visually familiar and the gold statue at the ice-skating rink is a classic backdrop for the obligatory photo op. I will add that there is a Nintendo Store in the plaza area and my children and their friends consider this a must see. And for any early birds there is the opportunity to see the Today Show host if you want to get down there first thing in the morning. During the holidays there is also the Christmas tree, but read my blog on crowds before attempting that tourist attraction. You also have an above average chance of seeing a celeb if you get there when interview guest are arriving at the Today Show or for the Jimmy Fallon show.

  I would say that Soho is a must see.  But that is a tricky choice with anyone younger than 13 or with a boy.  My son, Hunter, was having a fit down there at Christmas fighting the masses and he had no interest in going into the shops (except for a few chocolatiers who had samples out).  When my teen aged nieces where here this summer they could have spent all of their time there shopping at trendy boutiques and street vendors, but I knew their budget so we limited them to one day. Between people watching, galleries, restaurants, and shopping you could easily kill two days there, but be prepared for crowds and a lot of walking. There are no fast food anythings so if you get tired or thirsty be prepared to pay the piper for a spot to get a refreshment.

  One place that we always go with visitors is the East Village.  My mom would tell me, and does, that this a huge mistake. May-be I just like to take a walk down memory lane from my early days in NYC, but I think it shows the often unseen and grungier side of the city.  Again there is a lot of walking with very little reward except for peirogies at Veselkas. Between the massive number of Japanese restaurants that have moved in and the NYU dorms closing in on the neighborhood the vibe has certainly changed in the last 25 years, but I don't care what anyone says, I'm keeping it on my list.

  My least favorite sight has be to the World Trade Center Memorial..  The space is strange and haunting, and the buildings being erected in place of the void that was the World Trade Center is fascinating, but there is no feel good factor.  I'll put this on the list of "upon request".

  Museums? If they are old enough send them on their own and if not let them chose three galleries at the MET and be done with it.  Groups of more than three do not work. (I am laughing as I write that because I have only been with four or more people, so I know what I'm talking about) Everyone has a different method of viewing art, so keeping the styles limited helps in keeping things moving.  I am  a walk through and stop and look at what I like and Jeff is a start at the beginning and read every plaque. Even as husband and wife we differ, don't try to add Grandma to the mix. Tip:  At many museums the posted price is the suggested price.  Be generous if you can, but don't miss the museum because you don't think that you can afford it.

  I could go on.  But the real point is that there is something for everyone, although narrowing it down to your particular interest, time and budget can be challenging. 

  Walking, waiting, and weather are actually three factors that can foil even the best laid plans.

  I can not press the walking thing enough.  If you feet are not bloody nubs by the end of the day then you have not seen the city.  I am not joking.  One of my nieces actually sat down on the morning of her third day and said that she could not go on (she did).  Although my feet no longer hurt after a day touring around, I have not forgotten the pain.  Suck it up and keep going.  How often are you in New York City?

  Waiting.  If you go in to a good restaurant at a regular meal hour you will wait.  If you aren't waiting for a table then you might want to go somewhere else, lines are usually a good indicator in regards to the best restaurants (this does not include chain restaurants in Time Square where tourist flock because they recognize a restaurant name).

  Weather.  Summer is hot.  It is beyond hot.  It is humid. Unless you are one of those women who's thighs don't rub together because you are so thin then be prepared for chaffed inner thighs, or you could wear shorts or Spanks to avoid your sweaty legs from sticking together. Fall and spring are rainy, but as long as you don't mind frizzy hair and umbrella wars on the crowded sidewalks it is actually a good time to visit.  Winter is cold.  The wind tunnels caused by the tall buildings is a unique phenomenon to the city and it is very real. But if you dress appropriately it can actually be a great time to see the city.  "There is no bad weather, only bad clothing choices" (I stole that motto from a local high school with an extensive outdoor curriculum).

  Where to go? and what to wear? and when to come?  You tell me and I'll do my best to show you the town with as little pain as possible.

No Pants Subway Ride

  Last Sunday was the annual No Pants Subway Ride (think flash mob) organized by Improv Everywhere, a prank based collective in New York City .  In theory people get on the subway individually or in small groups and take off their pants leaving on their underwear (of course) and they get off and on the train at various stops until they reach Union Square where everyone converges in their skivvies.

  The only reason I was aware of this "happening" was because Cameron and a few of her friends decided that this sounded like a hysterical thing to do.  They went to Macy's last week to purchase matching boxers.  Since the girls were buying boxers I assumed that everyone on the subway would be wearing similarly modest undies.  Not so...(see photos below)







  For the most part wearing boxer shorts or boy short undies is no more revealing than what you see on the subway on a summer afternoon.  But some of these boys and girls were pushing the word "briefs".  Anyone who has ever ridden a subway understands that a "sub"way is underground meaning that you will need to walk up stairs to reach the outside or to transfer to another platform to another train.  I don't think that I need to go any further with the visual.

  The best sighting I had was early on in the afternoon.  The doors opened to an Express #2 train and a very beautiful woman wearing a parka, a hat, boots, and boy shorts was standing reading a magazine and next to her was a very good looking man wearing a leather jacket, boxers, black socks and dress shoes, and sunglasses.  They looked like a Calvin Klein print ad.  Oh, if only a fraction of the participants had been half as good looking.

  Jeff and I met Cam and her merry band at the Starbucks off of Union Square. They looked a little tired and sun deprived from spending the day underground, but they were no worse for the wear.  Actually, I want to send a very special shout out to the mom who chaperoned the girls and for them taking them for an afternoon of fun on the #1 and L trains. Making sure four lovely teenage girls stayed away from groping hands on those crowded trains took vigilance and a great sense of humor.

  Why didn't I do it?  I don't have the legs for it when they are sun kissed in the summer, a lot less when they are the color of uncooked biscuits in January.

 



 

House Proud

   I make an effort to keep a tidy house to balance the small space.  A pair of shoes on the livingroom floor becomes a tripping hazard and a backpack left on the table clutters the room.  Imagine the space between your couch and your t.v. as the size of my living room.  Our apartment has radiator heat, so the temperature tends to regulate between comfortable and a sauna. Add in four thirteen year old girls dancing for four hours to Just Dance III on the Wii... and the living room suddently became very hot and very small. 

  Jeff and I had gone out to buy a bottle of wine leaving Cam at home with her friends dancing and Jordan napping in one of the bedrooms.  When we got back Cameron's friend Rachel and her mother were standing in the hallway making final arrangements for getting her back home later that evening.  I had not realized that Rachel was coming over or I would have stayed home to meet her mom and I would have certainly had the girls move their coats and backpacks to Cam's bedroom so that the living room was not piled high with bodies and belongings. From what I gather from Cameron, Rachel's family has a lovely two story apartment in Morningside Heights (116th Street), so I would have wanted to present to Rachel's mom, "cozy comfort" in place of space.  Instead it looked more like a college dorm room.

  After much discussion about whether to see " Sherlock Holmes" or "Chipwrecked" the girls headed out to the movie theater three blocks away.  Jordan and I opened all of the windows, lit what is left of the holiday Yankee Candles, and even opened the front door to the hallway to bring in fresh air and to unfog the windows.

  We settled into a Friday night at home watching a movie On Demand when at 10:30 the girls rang the buzzer to get back onto the apartment.  Again, little did I know that Cecilia's parents had met the girls at the theater and had walked them back to our apartment so that she could grab her backpack. Cecilia's mom is a doctor at Columbia and they have a luxury high rise apartment near Columbia Hospital,  Now that the apartment was tidy and void of humidity I was glad that I had been able to invite at least one set of parents in without feeling like I had to exlain the chaos of the apartment.

  I am still getting used to our situation.  We definately have location, location, location, but...  I am still coming to terms with the size of the apartment.  My mom was visting us in NYC for the first time this past week and she seemed  unphased by the size of the apartment, although she did stay at a hotel down the street so as to avoid the fold out couch and sharing one bathroom. The fact that Cam regularly has friends over and the kids seem to have fun dancing and raiding the refrigerator seemingly unaware of the space (or lack there of) should reassure me that when I tell the my children, "home is where the heart is" I'm telling the truth.

The Road Less Traveled (and for obvious reasons)

  I got a call back for a job that sounded very promising.  But as with all the potential jobs there are the pros and cons that have to be examined. 

  First of all the hours are from 6 a.m. to 4 p.m. five days a week,, making it a long 50 hour work week and the job is salaried.  But it was working for a corporate catering company and I liked the idea of the fast paced environment and figured that if I was working in a busy environment the time would fly. Still, getting up at 5:00 a.m. to catch a 5:20 a.m.  #2 subway down to South Street Seaport was rather daunting.

  When I went for my first interview my son, Hunter, was with me, so although I saw the rat traps lining the sidewalks I was able to divert my attention to my conversation with him.  But when I went for my second interview I was alone. Although South Street Seaport has been built up as a major tourist attraction the area is still primarily a functioning fish market in the early morning hours.  So a large amount of the area are warehouse that are closed during regular business hours.  At one point I had to decide which street to walk down to reach the catering office which is literally underneath the Brooklyn Bridge at the end of South Street. I had two streets that I could take.  One was brightly lit by the sun with no cars lining the streets, but there were rat traps placed at each warehouse door and the other street had the shade of buildings still on it and cars lining the street but fewer rat traps, although I did worry that rats might be hiding under the cars.

  I don't know how rat traps work.  They look like roach motels except large enough for a rat.  I'm not sure if the rats go into the black box and die or if they go into the black box eat the poison and then leave and die.  Whatever... potentially each of those boxes that lined the sidewalks could have a rat trapped inside or inside eating rat poison.  What if I walked by and a rat ran out?  What if I walked by and the box shook with a rat trying to escape?  Hideous! 

  I chose the path with the sunshine on it but with more rat traps.  The fear of rats hiding underneath cars on the street with more shade dictated my decision.  But I still had the fear of walking by the rat traps and the rats inside the boxes responding to the sound of someone walking down the street and the boxes moving. So I literally ran down the street with my eyes diverted to the sky so as not to see the quaking rat traps.  I laugh even thinking about what I must have looked like to some South Street Seaport Tourist security agent sitting in a room monitoring the early morning streets before the tourist began flooding the area.

  Ok, so I got the dreaded rejection email the next day, but I have to say between the ten hour days and dodging rats this might have been for the best.

What Just Happened?

Journal Entry January 05. 2012


My mom is still visiting.  Of course the week that she is here NYC is freezing.  After I finished my telecommuting work we headed out to get something to eat. I've been feeling so blue about not being able to find a new job that I told her I wanted to stop by our church for the holiday vespers before we went to dinner.  When we got there the church receptionist said that vespers had ended for the season.  Really?  Even church is letting me down.  When we were waiting at the crosswalk for the light to change I noticed that we were standing next to "un-named retailor".  My mom gives me a gift certificate to this store every Christmas.  I don't know why.  It's not  a shop that I would ever go to, but for some reason she gives me the gift certificate and I buy the obligatory annual piece of costume jewelry from them.  So, when we were standing there I said "Oh, look, Mom, it's my beloved C.  I wonder if they are hiring."   Suddenly the woman standing next to us said, "What did you say?"  I wasn't even sure that she was speaking to me, so I hesitantly said, "My beloved C?"  "No the other thing."  "I wonder if they are hiring?"  "Yes!  I'm the district manager of the store and I know they are hiring."  She handed me her card and told me to call tomorrow.  What?  I've never even done retail.  Weird, but what the hell.  May-be instead of praying for an answer the Lord had set me back on the street to find the answer.